| stash reisylia interchange journal unofficial grounds |
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(@) fleur-de-lyszeh says:
you can still listen even if someone bites off your ears.blog clock
>:D
spit crib
time to spill your guts.
to-have / to-buy (or sell) list [2009]
gaming rig before december comes.new earphones / headphones fallout 3 collector's edition call of duty modern warfare 2 left 4 dead an o level cert books / comics And Then There Were None / Agatha Christie A Certain Slant of Light / Laura Whitcomb Chosen, House of Night / P.C. Kristin Cast New Moon / Stephenie Meyer Eyeshield 21 Illustrations FIELD of COLOURS Vampire Knight Volume 8 Vampire Knight Volume 9 i can like numbers
i don't remember.. |
need i say more?
figure the navigations on your ownyou can thank me later. enjoy. in memory of Raihan, 16 October 2008 we miss you dearly. |
oh yeah? i'm designing a set of characters for the story. i'm designing their uniforms, too. they're visible at my dA. |
what. szeh 6ix April 1992 huh i like cakess pastry anything that's vanilla mammals, birds and all reptiles fruit milk and cheese drums books poetry reading cooking baking stories art photography pictures vehicles eating writing gaming shopping music mythology paranormal flowers linguistics foreign money anime manga drawing bells i collect foreign / local money manga (only those that i really like) books games ornaments plushies board games stationery dictionaries pencil cases drawing blocks / jotter pads notebooks recipes anything that is cute (i.e. food erasers) i cbfed with humbugs and twits. |
HEY WHAT'S GOIN' ON you'll be safe if you listen to: "Complex Image" by Ayane i am just toellie crazy for katekyo and eyeshield 21. what i am watching / reading: i'd be lying if i said nothing. Fairy Tail [Anime] Naruto Shippuden [Anime] Katekyo Hitman Reborn! [Anime] Kimi ni Todoke [Anime] Kimi ni Todoke [Manga] Kimi ga Suki [Manga] Sprout [Manga] A Spot of Bother [Book] what i have watched / read: Zettai Kareshi [Japanese Drama] Nobuta wo Produce [Japanese Drama] Hachimitsu to Kuroba [Japanese Drama] Kurosagi [Japanese Drama] Nodame Cantabile [Japanese Drama] Hanazakari no Kimitachi e [Japanese Drama] Hana Yori Dango [Japanese Drama] Hana Yori Dango 2 [Japanese Drama] Gokusen [Japanese Drama] Boys Before Flowers [Korean Drama] Witch Yoo Hee [Korean Drama] My Name is Kim Sam Soon [Korean Drama] My Girl [Korean Drama] Goong [Korean Drama] Spirited Away [Japanese Animated Film] Howl's Moving Castle [Japanese Animated Film] Tonari no Totoro [Japanese Animated Film] The Cat Returns [Japanese Animated Film] Final Fantasy VII Advent Children [CGI Film] Ouran Koukou Host Club [Anime] Kanon 2006 [Anime] Spice & Wolf [Anime] Ghost Hunt [Anime] Jigoku Shoujo [Anime] Karin [Anime] Rozen Maiden [Anime] Rozen Maiden: Träumend [Anime] Rozen Maiden: Ouvertüre [Anime] Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge [Anime] Claymore [Anime] Tonagura! [Anime] Fruits Basket [Anime] Gakuen Alice [Anime] Chobits [Anime] La Corda D'oro [Anime] Ergo Proxy [Anime] Shugo Chara [Anime] Full Metal Panic! [Anime] Clannad [Anime] K-ON! [Anime] Hatsukoi Limited [Anime] Toradora! [Anime] Fate/Stay Night [Anime] Zettai Kareshi [Manga] Chobits [Manga] Alice 19th [Manga] Akuma de Sourou [Manga] MARS [Manga] Bloody Kiss [Manga] Othello [Manga] You're My Girlfriend [Manga] Taranta Ranta [Manga] Bitter Virgin [Manga] Sold Out! [Manga] Beast Master [Manga] Cat Street [Manga] Imadoki! [Manga] Koukou Debut [Manga] The Girl Who Leapt Through Time [Manga] Otomegokoro [Manga] A Child Called "It" [Book] The Raging Quiet [Book] The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time [Book] Pendragon: The Merchant of Death [Book] a million little pieces [Book] Tears At Bedtime [Book] Marked, House of Night [Book] Betrayed, House of Night [Book] Twilight [Book] After the Funeral [Book] and some others that i can't recall. |
where to next?
initial layout by: detonatedlove♥changes made by: yours truly. Mark's Flickr (my big brudder) Jocelyn's Blogshop blog exits Amanda HuiJia Olivia Cecelia Kathleen YuPing MiaoXian Jocelyn Bryan AK JiaYi Sufi Joel Sylvest Benson Diana ShiHui sites i feed on Practically Edible: The Web's Biggest Food Encyclopaedia Gizmodo Hotel 626 English Wikipedia Wiki Drama Addicts CNET Asia Not Pron Explosm Urban Dictionary PostSecret School Bag Shop Decal Girl MMORPG.com My Soju Itasho Iwako USA Anime Season Manga Fox |
Friday, October 31, 2008
happy halloween! •
happy halloween everyone!enjoy the pumpkins, candy, treats and scares. doubt you'll get those in singapore though. <_< exception for pumpkins. i wish we had halloween celebrations.. you know, trick or treat. WE DON'T. if you know about the author of the Twilight Saga, smeyer (Stephenie Meyer), you should all know that her book drafts got leaked into the internet. she mentioned in her blog that she has a good idea of who the people are. the people who leaked her drafts into the internet, that is. i was really shocked when i saw it. it was posted back, quite some time ago in august. but i only read it yesterday. it must hurt to have your original work leaked. without permission too. i hate people like that with no conscience at all and no respect for authors / artists / anyone in the art industry. it's sickening. as a result, smeyer had to postpone the book that she's currently working on; Midnight Sun. she also posted a draft on the net, with her copyrights. for me, i didn't click on the link because even if i read a spoiler, i won't know what's happening in the book as i have not read twilight, even. and i'm not a big fan of spoiling great stories for myself. even for shows, manga or anime, i don't read the summaries. it's pointless since you can't see / picture what happened at all. miss smeyer, i'm rooting for ya. i'm feeling better. though still coughing a little. i don't have a sorethroat, but my voice is really manly now. hahaha. due to all the coughing i guess! thanks for all your tags / get well soons / take cares everybody :) i'm feeling much better already. speaking of my manly voice, i was on Trickster, gaming just now, when some withheld number ringed me up. so i thought it was from a friend, or maybe even work, so i picked it up. too my disgust it was a damn china woman speaking in chinese. the conversation went something like: **please note that the conversation below is translated from chinese to english. do not mind any inaccuracies within the translation as my chinese is really.. really bad. me: hello? damnchinawoman: hello, i'm sorry but i would like to have 1 minute with you to ask you some issues for a survey. me: okay. damnchinawoman: thank you. may i ask, what phone model are you using? me: sony ericsson. damnchinawoman: i see. have you experienced any difficulties or problems using it? me: nope. damnchinawoman: so far so good? me: yes. damnchinawoman: so far so good huh? okay. did you need to sign a contract to get the phone? me: uh huh. damnchinawoman: i see. your voice is really sweet, i assume that you're a young lady around your 20s? me: i'm busy. damnchinawoman: (ignores my statement) may i know how old are you? i hung up. KISS MY ASS. no, actually, fuck off. i don't want your china saliva to contaminate my polished ass. my voice is sweet? for fuck's sake, i am having a cough. my voice is manly. don't tell me that if you see a man, speak to him, and feels that his voice is really manly, you tell him "hi sir, you have a sweet voice." don't bootlick me, because i don't own any. you're disgusting. you sounded like a desperate lesbian looking for a china-speaking partner. NO ONE WANTS YOU. what's your age? i bet you're 50. singtel, you really need to ban these china saleswomen from ringing anyone up on their handphones. it's like a nightmare that i can't wake up from. please. if there is a service that allows me to block phone calls from chinanese.. let me sign up for it. other than that, my day went fine. i just had a curry puff blinkblink and IT SUCKED. erww. it was too spicy but i managed to finish it. for the first time, i finished something that i found too spicy for my own good. normally, i'd throw them away. but when i went to the kitchen holding the bitten-once curry puff and walking towards the dustbin my mom was cutting some veg and then she stopped. and then she looked at me with O_O. so i didn't throw it.. i would've been able to if i didn't see her O_O. hahaha. it's all good anyway. yesterday, since i was feeling better, went to look for kathleen and olivia at night. wanted to get donuts. both of them were at the supermarket, then kathleen wanted to buy mogu mogu. it's a drink with nata de coco in it. really small and cute bottle. so kath took it. and oli recieved an sms from me, telling her that i'll be at the bakery. so she told kath "let's go to the bakery now." so kath's like "okay." they walked out. with the mogu mogu in hand. HAHAHAH. then when kath walked like 15m away, she's like EH?! and quickly went back to return the bottle. HAHAH. it was so funny when they told me. after i met up with them at the bakery and got my donuts we went to get their baba tea. baba. baba. then we went to huijia's voiddeck to hang out. kath lent me her ds while she played olivia's. i played her ds for quite some time x.x sorry kath. and then we played the wario side games. hahaha. it was fun :D snore rope was funny. there was the skin penguin that eats flies too. awhile more, huijia came! xD then she played the game where you have to blow the air in to make the ball float up. that was the most difficult one. o_o;; we joked a lot, about olivia's friend brandon, who read out the punctuations in oral, and her friend, future mrt station name. poobarlan. HAHAH. i forgot what else we joked about but we had lots. i had fun nonetheless. BBQ is coming soon next month. YAY. YAY. YAY. going out with kath to ehub later ^__^ to those having their school holidays, don't waste them :s GO OUT EVERYDAY AND DON'T GO HOME. pretend you didn't see that. hahah. bye.   this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 5:50 PM.Wednesday, October 29, 2008
oh brother •
 aw man. psh. don't mind the suck. i spent like 9876543210 years on this. ;_; so hard for me to do something really simple. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 11:59 PM. •
 ha! that's my ex-music player. i was screen capping my blog screen, and the bear happened to blink at that time. so i cropped the image and saved it.. for a long time because i forgot to paste it up. @ cecelia: i'm not mama. thanks :) i don't know what else to write here. uh... so i was reading up on Aries. my astrological sign.. like der. and found out that chinese equivalent is the Dragon. i'm born in the year of the Monkey, though. http://www.google.com then search Aries and click on a wikipedia link for more info. i'm not pasting the link here because i can't. there's a Ram symbol in the link so if i paste it here it comes out as numbers. i don't think you understand but whatever, if you want to see then just follow instructions ffs.
HAHAH. SO TRUE. for those who love burgers like me, DO IT. and then tag me so i can read it. hahaha. be cool. mos burger forever. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 1:14 PM.Tuesday, October 28, 2008
fuck ya real hard. •
you're the type of girl i hate the most.even if you combine bitch, slut, hoe, cunt, and a hundred more profanities together i doubt it'll be enough to describe you. THIS is the image of you, from me. i disliked you the first time i saw you. why? because you had 'lol i'm so pretty and you look lousy' written on your face. it's disgusting. i don't like anyone to look down on me. i hated you. i thought i had changed my opinion of you.. but really, no worries yeah? i still do. i have no association with you but meh, i wish i did. so i have a reason to bitch slap you in your feckin' face. if you know who you are... it's cool. please use the tagboard to the fullest. I WELCOME YOU. if you don't.. i'm laughing my ass off. hey. who else do think acts like YOU do? gosh.. i'm talking about OUR school. are you trying to be ignorant? not working, bitch. i'd love to let the whole world know who the fuck you are. but i don't have the right to. i wasn't supposed to post about this even. so i'm writing it without names. you think doing this will get you anywhere? get you a boyfriend? sure. but i'm telling you. if i were a guy and you behave like some prostitute on the loose.. i won't even grant you a look. 'kay hoe? no matter how pretty you try to be. you won't be shot a look of envy. you'd pretty much attract attention from all your twit behaviour. i find it funny when girls like you try to act like that. it is so fucking entertaining. please don't do it anymore though. i may spill my puke over your beautiful clothes. oh yeah.. mind you. your clothes look better than you. you flirt with ANY GUY like they're yours. and i have no bloody idea why they fall for it. i don't care about girls who flirt with their boyfriends. i really hate those that flirt with guys that are not their boyfriends, geddit? not insulting your beauty. you know? nevermind the 'beauty' part. actually.. i'm commenting on how grotesque you are. ew. i don't feel like continuing anymore. your twit germs are getting to me. hope ye get fucked :) good luck getting someone to fuck you. though i think no one's interested at all. or should i say no one will be / would be / should be / NOT EVEN MAY BE. it's overt. i don't feel like saying anything else. sorry for all the language. be cautious of girls like that. they may look revolting but somehow they kick ass at putting up a cute façade. ugh.. i better stop now before i PUK- this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 11:34 PM.Sunday, October 26, 2008
:D •
Lauri is wonderful.Lauri = the vocalist of The Rasmus. if you're gonna label him with anything crude i am going to punch you in the groins / vulva :) The Rasmus - In The Shadows i love the vid. o_o especially when the crows come in. it's been 2 and a half days since the last time i stepped out of my house. because of this darn cold + cough. cool cold. the cough's really bad to the point where it feels like asthma. it's actually pretty boring to stay at home. i want to go out, but at the same time i don't wanna 'cause i'll probably get more ill. so.. i gotta bear with it for now, rofl. for the past 2 and a half days i've been drawing, eating a lot, watching anime, watching game streams, listening to music, downloading stuff, using msn, not pron-ing (go play it. you can find the link under the list of links i keep in 'connections'. if you're impatient don't play it. thanks.) and you know, the usual stuff. work called twice, last friday and yesterday. last friday when they called i told them "i can't go to work" and they hung up so i expected them to call yesterday since.. they thought i just couldn't work for that particular day but NO it's because i'm really sick. so yesterday they called again (it's a girl who called so it cannot be Naz) and she said "you're working afternoon shift" so i'm like "i can't work tomorrow 'cause i'm sick." and she said "oh.. okay, bye" cool cat. fast. i wonder when i can resume work. with this sick ass cough i can't go anywhere.. some people may get the SARS fits even though it's already outdated. those.. clean nerds..? you get my drift. whatever. don't give a shit. and about my work uniform, the one that got dyed purple.. (only yuping, olivia and cecelia knows what this is) my mom got it bleached off, but there are still some visible flaws, not really obvious though. i'm so glad stain removers exist.. or i may get hanged. urgh. *EDIT: don't like working alone. it's so... untouched. pretend you didn't see that. it's so BORING when you don't know anyone there! .. and some of them are really oblivious. it may just be me but oh, psh. my bad. think i'm gonna start drawing again on cs2. rofl, i have no li MY HANDPHONE JUST DROPPED. *rofl, i have no life when i'm sick because i only can stay at home like duh. last but not least.. uh, fuck you? have a fun weekend. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 4:44 PM.Saturday, October 25, 2008
uh. •
 don't ask me why i did this. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 10:55 PM.Friday, October 24, 2008
+o( •
ever coughed to the point where you feel like you're about to vomit?i have. i just did. i mean.. just coughed like that, not just vomitted. having a really nasty cold right now. it's crazy :( sorry if i sounded cranky on the phone / on msn / wherever because i just didn't have the mood to make my brains work or come up with anything fun to say. my funny brain is closed for mechanical checks today.. and maybe tomorrow too. been coughing + having a running nose since last night. my mom gave me a loo roll to blow my nose with. hahaha. woke up in the morning and told my mom to buy some donuts. normal ones. not those with toppings. yeah.. went back to sleep till noon, my mom bought 4. i ate 2, then had my lunch. and ate the remaining 2 at 5pm. i would label myself as having a big appetite.. and not a big stomach. that's what yuping said.. she said i have a big stomach. hahah! if i had a big stomach i would look like donny. ok i'm gonna break away for today's happenings and recap what happened yesterday. uh... oh! went to arab street with olivia kath huijia and myself. went there because i needed a replacement for the jewel that fell off my hair band (the one you use to tie your hair, not the kind you hold your fringe with).. it really like it so i wanted it to look nice again. so olivia brought us to the store she got her jewels from.. it's jewel paradise. TONNES of jewels. a large variety. we tried to look for the jewel that matched the one on my hair band. after awhile.. we couldn't find one so i asked the guy in the store. he looked for one that was different.. but it wasn't obvious.. and it was free of charge. it was just 1 jewel and rather small so he didn't charge me. BUT STILL HE WAS SO KIND! heehe ^__^ he helped me paste it back on my hair band too. he told me not to wear it for the day. then.. we left for somerset. to sumi for lunch. kath played her ds while the rest of us ate. olivia had yakiniku. but more like yakichick (according to the reciept) i tried 1. it was delishers. huijia and i had ramen! then they ordered gyoza and kimchi. the kimchi was extremely spicy. hahah. it was good though! i loved the gyoza. the base was crispy and the inside was juicy. yum. 6: donny wasn't there because he was sick or something. meh. yuping and cecelia were working yesterday. yuping got tortured. kept walking back and forth to take plasters. hahah. cecelia was in zone b so we couldn't talk to her :s saw cherry. she was really friendly. missed everyone there. and the food. after we burped we went to toys r us (@ vivocity) to play with the gachapon. BURH we spent a fair amount of time in there.. wasting money. rofl and apparently they did not refill MANY of the machines which made me really mad because i wanted the mos burger one. and one of the machines were faulty. or should i say 2 or more. it was stupid. but we had fun anyway. after that kath and olivia got their crackers/candy and we went to the open space to sit down. LOVED THAT PLACE. super windy and clean < only applies to the time when we just got there. played with water and took lots of photos. went to daiso after that. ah. that reminds me. my stuff are still in huijia's bag xD hahah. maybe i'll get them back the next time i see her. that's about it.. i'm a lil' lazy to continue with details. we went back after we went out to the open space for a few more pictures. oli and kath went for dinner while huijia and i went home. was supposed to go hang out after dinner but it rained.. so we called it off. recieved a call from work today. telling me that "i have work tomorrow." told them i can't work tomorrow and without questions they said "okay." i doubt i'll be able to work for sun and monday too. if they ask me why i'm just gonna say i'm not well. which is like, the truth. who wants to pay for someone to go to work and spread germs to the staff / guests? noone. precisely. man, i really miss baking. haven't had time to bake since forever.. guess i'm tight on schedule. work and going out :s aaarrrggghhh. darn this running nose business. i'm not going out for the next few days.. not with this running nose. have a good weekend everyone. enjoy the pictures. HAHAH.              this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 9:25 PM.Sunday, October 19, 2008
BURP •
huh.today i slept at 4am because i was reading manga. thanks. woke up at approximately 11am. around there. used the com, read manga again. FYI it's cause i'm reading from vol 1 to vol 20 (at the mo) read it before last time but forgot where i stop, so decided to read it from the start. after that planned to go out with cecie at 5pm. but it rained like cows and lambs so we decided to push the meeting time further, till 6:15pm. she accompanied me to tm and cs. wanted to get shoelaces cause i'm bored with my current shoelace and black hairdye and other stuff. then. we went to mos burp-ger and had her dinner and my lunchinner. yaaas i had mos' fish burger and milk tea for the first time. it was D. TO THE E. TO THE L-I-C-I-O-U-S okay. then i did stupid things again i think.. we talked about many things too. somehow when i'm with her i got a lot of things to talk about. don't know why. hahah. told her about work. like me trying to get used to the people there and stuff. YAHH not gonna think about those anymore tomorrow. i'ma do my best to.. to what? i forgot what i wanted to say. huijia and olivia worked today. they both did bumper boats, but different shifts. huijia told me she sunburnt herself. the station is sheltered too! hahah. i don't know how she did it xD have afternoon shift tomorrow. yeaaah. afternoon shift's cool because you can see how the park is like at night. really pretty with all the lights on. i don't think i have anything else to write about that concerns you. 'kay bye. O__O this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 11:14 PM.shift-less •
don't have any shifts for tomorrow.. so i guess it won't hurt to update.i just woke up like an hour ago, so was pretty drunk. actually 'drunk' doesn't sound right.. whatever. nevertheless.. i'm out of somber. raihan.. i'm not crying anymore, but i still miss you very much, and i still feel that cancer should be fucked. trying the best i can to think positive. what did i not update on? work.... okay. day 1 the moment kathleen and i got there, we exchanged our ezlinks for the staff pass at the security room. the security guard was a stern man.. we took some time to get him to understand that 'it is our first day working today at the rides department.' okay then we went in.. looked for Naz. he taught us how to check in. WE DON'T USE PUNCHCARDS YES we use fingerprints. it is such a fun thing to do.. new experience for me. after that.. went to the office. that's where the tension began. my god, i didn't know anyone there (except kathleen) and noticed that everyone there knew each other fairly well. i felt really awkward.. even during lunch time.. seriously okay! soon we went to our assigned posts. was in charge of the kiddy track. took over Sharil, who did the AM shift. after i got there, he only told me about filling up the form, and nothing else.. after that it rained. i stayed under the brolly. Fazuan, who was in charge of the flipper, came over and asked why i have not kept the cars in the storage. i just gave him the '???' face and he told me to go to the flipper first. there's a room there for shelter so yah. he helped me with the cars.. then told me about how i should go about keeping the cars, when it rains that is. the car is really damn heavy by the way. maybe heavy for me. strained my back carrying it and almost sprained it cause i was trying really hard not to drop it. now my back has muscles. yeah.. then he taught me how to write a report on bad weather. i wonder if i'm allowed to talk about things that happen in the theme park cause i really don't know. ok... to summarize it it was a really awkward day that made me want to quit because i didn't know anyone there.. it just felt really weird. you know? like getting to a new class but this time with 80 classmates to hang out with.. of course all 80 of them weren't there but still it's a large group and i don't know how to talk to them. ARGH YOU GET MY DRIFT? YEAH. awesome. yesterday went out with cecie at around 4:30. she wanted to get a pressie for fooshihui.. a jumper. so we went to look around at tm and cs. i don't remember other jokes.. i just know she laughed a lot. then ok.. joke of THAT day. we were at NTUC. do you know the sunsilk hair lotions? those in little bottles with a nozzle on top. i wanted to smell the lotion.. so i opened the nozzle and squeeze the bottle a little so that the smell will come out. a bit of the lotion shot out from the bottle and almost went into my nose. she laughed like crazy.. so did i. HAHAHA. then the next one i wanted to smell, i didn't put it at my nose.. i put it sideways, so it was facing somewhere else.. i squeezed the bottle. the lotion came out and shot behind my back. didn't get on my shirt though. HAHAH. it was hilarious okay. that kinda made my day and cheered me up. day 2 it is so much better today.. though i still don't talk to people nor look at others in the eye (for what?) BUT i made new friendsss. Hafiz, Clarissa, and Casper. i was in charge of the red baron today. Casper... he's very friendly and nice!! taught me how many people can sit in each ride and stuff. Clarissa was the relief for my station when i had my break.. she's friendly too! Hafiz was with me for awhile to teach me everything about the red baron. i need to operate the machine! it's very very fun. he's cool, in his own ways. hahah. yuping worked today! think she did fine, she had fun too! she didn't like the uniform.. though. after work yuping and i went to macdonalds for lunch. my stomach was flat. i was very hungry. she was so shocked at how much i ate at home. cause i told her for 2 days of last week, which was fri and sat i ate rice, with fish veggie and meat and after eating that i eat a bowl of cereal with milk. she was like "HUH?!" hahaha. after that we waited for cecelia and kath to arrive. when they joined up with us we already finished our food. kath had fries and mcflurry while cecie had mcwings. then we went to walk around in ehub. she bought a keychain.. very cute keychain, magnetic dolphins hugging each other. hahah. then we went to the arcade. I SAW CAPYBARA PLUSHIES. and watched this pair playing taiko no tatsujin. DON'T HAVE THE "DON'T CLAP" SOUND! WALAUWEI. that other time i went there it had that idiotic noise and today it didn't. what is the meaning of this? OK nevermind. there's always another day. didn't have enough money to play today. only had 10 cents left in my wallet.. hahah. didn't have the card either. awe man. after that took bus 3 back home.. after i got home i fell asleep immediately. not at my doorstep. but when i lied down i slept at once. was too tired i guess. that's all.. folks. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 12:36 AM.Friday, October 17, 2008
i suck for being like this. •
it's only been 11 hoursbut i miss you like hell. you'll always be the guy i know. no matter how much you've changed.. no matter how much weight you've lost.. you will always be the raihan that i respect. look.. i have work tomorrow. my eyes are gonna swell again.. will you come back soon? pretty please..? let me make up for before. i miss you so.. very much. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 8:32 PM.Thursday, October 16, 2008
R •
dearest.you have been a mentor, a friend someone that is one of a kind. i did not know that you have been suffering. i deeply regret that we have not spent more time together. i got to know you the first time when you were starting up your very own a band that i love to the core bandmates that made me feel that i already lived life to the fullest i took some time to open up yes it's true. i love each and every single on of you. i got mad at you.. for lying. for not telling the truth for weaving your own stories for hurting my trust and respect for you. but after i heard that you fell ill.. i started to rethink. this train of thoughts repeated it's route for almost forever but i forgave you. you never knew i was mad at you.. you never knew that i forgave you. i couldn't bring myself to confess to you who was suffering. i dreamnt of a nightmare where our bandmate ringed me to tell me that it was the end. it was a nightmare from 3 months ago and i woke up from it thinking that "whatever that happened in dreams will never happen in real life." i was proven wrong when i recieved his call today. 9:49pm i got home from work. i sat down. and slid my bag off my back. that was when my phone rang. i picked it up wondering why he would call. Hello? Yes? Did you hear about it? What about..? I have some news for you. We won't be playing songs for him anymore. He just passed away. i forgot what i replied to the sentences after. but the first thing i thought about was almost childish you're lying. don't lie.. don't fucking tell me lies now. i'm 16. you can't fool me despite that i believed. i went to my room quietly trying to prevent any sound from leaking i have never felt so unpleasant so demoralized so filled with regret so devastated so lost so angry with myself so freaking sad i deplored. i weeped. i tried not to make a sound but i still did. i lost my appetite to eat. i lied to everyone that i was going to sleep. i lost the voice to speak. i got calls to affirm your current state. first from her. then from him. it was finally certain that you have left us. do you remember? when we first met i didn't speak. but you asked while looking at me "who's the drummer?" you knew it was me. that was when i jammed for the first time although full of suck you said i was catching up. i felt extremely happy because someone liked my effort. have i told you that you're awesome on the drums? you were the lead guitarist but you did equally well on drums i respect you. your talents and how you're always patient with others. i love you. you're wonderful. you're kind. you liked my humour and i liked yours. i still keep the drumsticks you gave to me i sanded them too. i thought it must only be natural to take good care of something precious. don't mind the present tense... i just can't make myself refer to you like you're gone. you even helped me with studies. walked home with me. we had the whole world to talk about we just got along really well. you were my best buddy. amongst everyone.. the one who i could speak to freely was you. were you suffering a lot? did you cry? did you think "i want to recover so i can jam with everyone soon."? because i did. i wanted you to recover fast because i missed playing music with you. but now you're in some place far away from us.. why? i wonder. why is life always playing games? games that are unfair.. that are unexplained.. ARE LIVES THAT MUCH FUN TO PLAY WITH? he is.. so young.. instead of letting him recover and move on you took away his life. and there's no damn reason why it's great. i don't like it.. i don't like your games. although i am really thankful that life was given to me to meet you. i have learnt many things from you. hardship.. skills.. kindness and music. i would never have learnt how to drum without you. your comments on the things i have done i greatly treasure them. i want to remain humble just like your dad. my dear friend... may you be safe. i hope you see my heartfelt words and hope that you will remember them like how i'll remember you always. i miss you i love you and thank you.. for everything that you have done. with all the love you can find in the world, yours truly, szeh. P.S. please be safe.. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 11:57 PM.Wednesday, October 15, 2008
interview •
it went okay. kathleen and i got the job.hj yp and oli are getting their calls by this fri / sat. though i'm not exactly enthusiastic. i keep thinking about what my interviewer said. "people's lives are in your hands" "it's more than just pressing the start and stop button" "everywhere you go, you need to be alert and you need to bear 'safety' in mind" what the hell. this is gonna be a totally new thing for me. i accepted the job. yeah. this is ridiculous.. somehow i think that i'm not up for this. i don't know why. i'm so fucked up. everything is happening at once. i don't want to screw things up. i don't want to cause any trouble. though he told us that we'll be attached to the easy stuff first.. i still can't put my mind at ease. did i pick up the right job, i wonder? other than that. i had fun today at the arcade playing hotd4 with olivia.. but not entirely cause i kept thinking about the work and my concerns / worries about the job. hopefully it will be a new and wonderful experience working with new people.. who i have never worked with. and of course to be used to being alert and responsible.. which is something i haven't really been working on. since my previous job didn't require me to do so. kathleen went back first today. she wasn't feeling well. get well soon :) sorry for such a dull post... i just wanted to speak my mind. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 2:02 AM.Monday, October 13, 2008
日番谷 冬獅郎 (L) •
 ... i'm tired of making changes. so i think i'll just go with this.. though i think he looks a tad weird. just imagine he's standing at attention. okay? -_- goodness. too tired to make any more amendments. k run through. that's Hitsugaya from Bleach. did changes multiple times and finally got something that looks.. rather decent. Hitsugaya Tōshirō (C) Tite Kubo Fanart (C) me. like duh. and now i'm going to bed. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 4:47 AM.a is for asshole •
got home at 11:45 today. sat on my butt switched on the PC and here i am.. blogging. after like, an hour? yeah whatever.went to tm and cs today, with ah-partner kath and high-partner oli. went there in search of a job because we never thought ****** ***** **** ** ** *** ** *********. yeah you'll find out.. like tomorrow. and it's already tomorrow so i'll tell you. escape called us up for an interview! makes sense now? "****** ***** **** ** ** *** ** *********.". starry eyed? wrong. those are asterisks. by the way get used to my blogskin. i don't plan to change it anytime soon. though i'm getting sick of it already. what the hell? yeah, so escape called us to go for the interview next tuesday at 3:30pm. SO. DARN. GLAD. after they called (almost) everyone they were calling each other to ask about whether all of us recieved the call. i wonder if we're the only ones going to the interview or if there's gonna be more people. whatever, man. we're fab. plan to play house of the dead 4 with oli after our interview on tues. hahaha! too tempted after watching them play the other time. kath and i are gonna buy rainbow toesocks! whee. saw them just now at tm. soooo cute. after our so called.. job hunt, we went to jiabehhh's house. i was actually going to central park to find cecie and oli's pigu because hj told me "kath oli and her were gonna watch a movie." and i didn't feel like watching movies (again) so soon. BUT. hj said "we're gonna play hotd3." that's a completely different thing. heaven and earth. north and south. so i'm like "O_O K." asked yuping and cecie but they didn't want to come over to hj's place.. so i went after i had noodles and a glass of milk. burp. after i got there mx opened the door cause hj was busy killing zombies. HAHAH. can't blame someone for being a killer. went in the room and jubi was tailing me while olivia was screaming my name i don't know why. maybe my name works like a tranquilizer in times of panic and distress. hahah but it was funny. kath didn't play.. guess she was enjoying just by watching :] we did shifts. first hj (mouse) and i (keyboard). then olivia (mouse) and i (keyboard) then miaoxian (keyboard) and i (mouse). I'M NOT BEING SELFISH OKAY it was because kath didn't want to play. then after that my ass was hurting sitting on the chair for so long so i passed it on to oli. then they fought with the boss but lost.. then miaoxian wanted to throw the cd case at the PC. hahah! luckily she didn't. their comp just came back from hospital. watched some clips from (ah.)zumanga d(ah.)ioh and kanon wakeshima's suno no oshiro [pv]. watched lots on kimura sensei. (ah.)ha(ah.)ha! actually i planned to (ah.) anything with "ah" but i decided not to. too difficult to read. :s after we were done the clips we went home! sorry to bother you so late at night hj! but i had fun. ah. toesockstoesockstoesockstoesocks. D. to the E. to the L I C I O U S. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 12:25 AM.Sunday, October 12, 2008
I LOVE SETH MACFARLANE •
(L) his cartoons. hahaha. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 2:49 PM.winter edition •
it's october! so i thought i'd give my blog a new look.the blue is pretty isn't it. if it looks ugly then you should go make yourself colour blind. i love my blog's new layout. to be honest, i spent 2 days looking for the right blogskin. i'm very particular about the layout so.. i spent a lot of time hunting for one. but to no avail. ugh. thinking of it makes me sic- +o( so i thought.. i should just stick to the same skin but change some stuff. wanted yellow but i thought it'd be too.. sunshiney and bright. so i ended up with this. if you hate my new blogface then BEAT IT. i don't like your face either. how about the new playlist? OK. to the point now. those escape theme park people have not called yet. think i'll give it up. or it's gonna take up too much of my time waiting for it. don't think they want moonlighters anyway :) so.. this calls for another round of job hunting, where i actually do something. that escape theme park thing.. my friends got it for me. because when i got there they already filled in everything for me. yeah.. i plan to earn some cash before my holidays end. or else i'm gonna feel so unaccomplished so demoralized so unfulfilled so.. SO NOTHINGEARNEDWHENIHADTHECHANCEGAY. you get my drift? awesome. 9 oct ringed hj. we planned to return our loaned books that day. funny enough (don't hate if you don't find it funny. 'cause i find it funny you ass.), i forgot to bring my books. so i ended up watching her return hers.. met ocky inside. they reached before us. hahah. then.. we looked at cook books! left there after downloading a cake recipe book. then we went to TM and CS. they bought some food there to snack on along the way. mmm. then we went to walk around that area. after that, we went back to tampines and went to buy MORE food. actually, it was only me. because i didn't buy any back at the interchange. then we went to jia-behhhh's house. her mom cooked fried rice! she said we could have our dinner at her place so yeah. DEELISH. i still remember the taste. hahah. loved it. oh. forgot to mention, before that we rented The Wig and The Haunted Apartment. The Haunted Apartment was better IMO. but they're both really good horror movies :] no kidding. loved the plot in The Haunted Apartment and loved the realism in The Wig. both movies had their pros. no cons. so we watched 2 movies! coolio. after the last movie, we watched punk'd on mtv. so darn funny. hahaha. that was all for that day! 10 oct went to cecelia with the library went to the library with cecelia* to return my books because i forgot to bring them out the day before.. as mentioned in the previous para. after putting the books in the book drop we went into the library for some air-con (originally) but then we found purpose. went to the 2nd level, got hold of some books on food barbequeing ideas, went to the kids section and sat on our asses and READ. after an hour or more of sitting on our butts we got hungry lookin at all the food and decided to loan them. woot. then we went to get some food at old chang kee because i felt like having some of the spicy squid jia-behh had the day before.. AND IT WAS GOOD. REALLY GOOD. please try it. i also bought the ham and cheese pie kath bought the day before. once we got our food we went to macdonald's. for ice-cream. hahaha. gluttony is a sin. my eyes censored that. went to NTUC to find this 'red wine vinegar' thing. but we couldn't find it.. so we went to.. CS. looked at some watches. i saw one by juicy and it was a really cool watch. i never knew juicy couture had ungirly designs. finally after walking about we went home. 11 oct nothing much in the morning, but went out with cecelia at about.. half past 7 to look for her shoes. she's working tomorrow so she wanted to get new ones. her old one's gonna fall apart soon. but we couldn't find the kinda shoes she wanted so we went to buy drinks and she bought cup corn / corn cup / cup o' corn from the night market. we didn't know where we should settle down at so we went to the playground near kath's house. had a really good chat with her. like.. a 2hr 30min chat. hahaha. talked about lots of things. we spent 10% of the chat on donny's belly. hahah! 30% on work and the rest on the miscellaneous. in a nutshell, i enjoyed the my day very much :D hmm. i guess that's about it. it's almost morning so i'm going to bed. eyes are as opened as garfield's. have a wonderful weekend! this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 2:48 AM.Thursday, October 9, 2008
huh? •
was that all?cecelia, we were not planning to leave you out or anything like that. it's because you're not feeling well, that's why they didn't ask you out. initially, it was just huijia, kathleen and me. kathleen said she was gonna look for a job around the east area tomorrow, so i said "okay, why not call huijia along?" because i thought yuping and olivia were going back to sumi with you. and then, the next day.. which was today, i had my f&n exam. so i planned to meet them after i'm done bathing and stuff. i didn't know all of them were there, until you told me. and i didn't reply the last message you sent me, because i wanted to know exactly what the fuck happened. and it turns out that, it was because they cared. they didn't want you to come out when you're not feeling well. woman, it was raining. today. you're gonna feel cold. fo sure. they cared about you. really now... let's get along, 'kay? i don't know why you were so angry.. i know you were lonely because you're at home, staring at the pc, doing nothing, rotting away, but man. we ALL feel that way when we're sick. isn't that what patients are supposed to do? be a good girl, stay at home, rest, or watch some tv.. when i'm sick, i wouldn't even think of going online. well maybe i'm exempted 'cause my computer sucks. it really does. that's why i don't think about using it as often as you do. hell.. let's just leave this be. i don't know how i should put it. the real problem. you need to realize it on your own. because i really think it's not gonna work at all if i'm the one telling you. i'm afraid you won't accept any critiques given to you and flip like mad. so yeah. find out what it is, after recapping everything that has happened today. we still love you. on a better note.. hello. f&n is over. it is FINALLY OVER. OK, exclude the exams in nov but man it's over! my main papers! HA. we found a job! at escape theme park / wild wild wet. we submitted our application forms. thanks for filling up mine for me guys :) they said to contact us tomorrow. i hope all of us get the job. after we submitted the form to this super friendly and funny guy at wild wild wet, we went to walk around at downtown east. i got myself an ice-cream cone from jollybean. mmmm. still like macdonald's ice-cream cone, though. after that, went back to tampines and they bought sushi. then went to huijia's house and had dinner there. the soup was delicious! so was the veggie :p then we watched money not enough 2. great movie, if you understand dialects. hahah watch this if you played mario. though i think those of you who never played mario will still watch it anyway. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 12:03 AM.Monday, October 6, 2008
N/A •
OK, i really don't have anything to blog about. but i'll try.yesterday hockys, kx and sufi went for KTV. 0% hype. only olivia and huijia hyper. i don't know, maybe it was too squeezy for highing? i think i broke my voice yesterday. O__O not like i'm good at singing or anything, but yeah. think it's because when they sang linkin park i shouted. attempt to be hyper. whatever. overall, it was really cool. i had fun eating snacks in the dark with kathleen. hahaha. after that, we went to pay. only 6 bucks per head, pretty cool. after that, we went to kfc. they ate. i played on kathleen's DS. TAIKO NO TATSUJIN! my favourite hype game. then yu ping was "bom bom bom bom"-ing beside me. the game already had sound effect. maybe she felt that there wasn't enough sound coming out from the DS. hahaha. after that they took some photos.. inside and outside of kfc. don't have anything to blog about for today. oh. we went to the airport to see sufi off. i didn't do anything much there so there's nothing for me to write about. to see what happened go see olivia or huijia's blog. sufi, hope you had fun yesterday with everyone at the ktv and kfc. because we all did. i'm not exactly a close friend of yours, so i didn't have much to talk about today. so all i can say now is, you're good at singing chinese songs. be safe in thailand and keep up the gaming! we're gonna miss you and hope to see you during november. don't stop eating. you're skinny like fuck. now. whoever that took 'Reisylia'.. go fuck yourself. after you've done that, delete that username and then you can begin repenting / cutting yourself / crying. hope you lag in your game, bitch. when you start lagging, you know it's comeuppance :) unless YOU thought of 'Reisylia' first, i would like you to eat my shit. enjoy your meal. this bear watched the cloud beside it as it shitted stars while smiling at 12:24 AM. |
